Mia madre

Mia Madre: World's First recipient of a "Black Hole" award
Ihave decided to create a new award system for films - commencing with those films currently being produced in Italy - which more accurately reflects reality and as an antidote to the current "Star" rating system. The "Black Hole" rating system is aimed at everyone associated with the production of the particular film - producer, director, actors, scriptwriter - and also includes the group or organisation that provided the funding. The media critics who helped promote the film and determine the allocated "Star" rating, also come under scrutiny.

Mia Madre is a film of 106 minutes whch appears to have been scripted by a group of damaged femenists from a women's collective which, most likely, gets its funding directly from the Government or at least from a State-funded committee. The script was unoriginal, superficial, totally without any redeeming features and, of course, entirely politically correct; it appeared to have been hasdtily thrown together at the last minute, probably to use up the current round of State-funding available to the producers and scriptwriters. Maybe there was also another, higher motive, creating work for some unemployed production and acting "talent"?

The acting was neither credible or inspiring. Moretti was in his element, playing non-other than Moretti! Margherita Buy was not much better giving a plodding and entirely predictable performance. To be fair to Buy and in her defence, she was having to deal with an appalling script.

Nanni, in the future, I suggest that you do not accept every idea for a film or banal script that comes your way......I am assuming that the "inspiration" for the film was not your idea, Nanni? Nanni?

Moretti's direction was formulaic and lacklustre, but under the circumstances and given the nature of the material, it was adequate.

My greatest ire is reserved for the "critic" Dario Zonta who awarded the film 4 Stars. I am unsure whether his delusional state was due to the accidental exposure of some mind altering substances or, in fact, he and I saw entirely different films. By rating this film with 4 Stars, he is committing a fraud upon the general public(people like you and me) who do not deserve to pay hard-earned money to be deceived. I trust and assume that Mr Zonta in no way related to, a friend or colleague or connected in any way whatsoever to the production of this disaster? Mr Zonta?

In summary, I would rather go to the dentist for a root-canal filling without the benefit of an anaesthetic or perhaps have both my eye-balls removed with red-hot spoons, than have to endure another viewing of this film.

I hereby award Mia Madre 5 "Black Holes" in all possible categories. May the entire cast and crew go the way of the Titanic, with the loss of all hands to prevent  the possibility of any similarly mind-numbing collaborations in the future.

Hector Bucciottus(Roma)